The rise of Marie Kondo’s new Netflix show Tidying Up has everyone on a tidy up and declutter binge. And the results are in: Less stuff! More organization! Minimalism!
Wait. Minimalism? But I like my stuff, you say. Maybe I don’t want to tidy up…
Tidying up and decluttering doesn’t have to lead to minimalism. But with the rise of the KonMari method, which uses the idea of ‘sparking joy,’ it seems there is a new minimalism on the rise, and it’s time to use that to help you declutter and tidy up!
And maybe even help others and the planet in the process.
Get ready to learn steps to tidy up and declutter your home and how to profit off the stuff you’re giving away!
A New Minimalism
I’d like to call myself a minimalist, but after watching that Netflix documentary (Minimalism – or here, read the book, Minimalism: Living a Meaningful Life), I realized I wasn’t.
A strict minimalist would keep only items that have a clear use.
Do I need art on my walls or a food processor to survive? No, of course not.
But do I enjoy them both and do they bring me joy? Yes, of course!
There’s a need for a new minimalism, one that clears up misconceptions. Minimalism doesn’t mean you have to live a tidied up, but joyless life.
You can have the best of both worlds!
The original purpose of the minimalist movement was to remind people: the quantity of material items should not be the gauge by which we measure how full or happy our lives are.
It’s often the intangible things that are what bring the most happiness. Spending time with a loved one; experiencing a new place; a stroll through the park; a really, really good glass of wine at a lake-side restaurant.
Okay fine—the wine is tangible…but it’s serving to enhance the place, the moment, the intangible.
What’s the Balance Then?
The KonMari method to declutter and tidy up your home relies on sorting out items that don’t ‘spark joy’ for you.
This is different than just getting rid of things you don’t wear and keeping ones you do.
For example, when I went through my clothes two weeks ago – clothing is “Lesson One” of the KonMari Method – I rediscovered a striped blue-white button up dress. It’s not an everyday kind of dress, and given that I’m back in ‘colder weather’ it’s not something I’ll be wearing for half the year.
But, it absolutely sparks joy in me. I pick it up, and I just can’t wait to wear it again. I love the cut, I love the color, and I love that it has pockets.
And to be clear, the decluttering method of finding what ‘sparks joy’ does not mean coming up with reasons why things spark joy. You don’t need a reason, you just need the feeling. This gets a bit harder to understand as you make your way through Kondo’s ‘Lessons’ but it’s probably easiest with clothing and books (Lesson 2).
If you do wear or use something often, it’s probably a sign that it does spark joy for you. If you aren’t wearing or using it often, then maybe it doesn’t spark joy for you.
But a lot of times it seems like when we can’t decide if an item sparks joy in us or not, there’s another thing looming around it: guilt.
The Guilt of Getting Rid
The hardest part for a lot of people will be parting with items that used to spark joy for them. That’s certainly where I struggle.
I have a beautiful emerald green silk top that I plucked out of consignment obscurity and it definitely used to spark joy for me. But after implementing the KonMari method, it definitely didn’t hold a candle to the aforementioned striped dress.
I felt bad for the shirt.
Partially I don’t wish to imagine it in the trash or someone spilling food on it, or being owned by someone who won’t value it like I did…
…but how was I really valuing it? By wearing it out of guilt every so often?
One of the most valuable insights I got from Tidying Up is how to give your stuff away and feel good about it.
Express Gratitude
When you come across the first clothing item that doesn’t spark joy for you. Rather than just tossing it aside, thank it.
I know, it sounds very woo-woo to thank your clutter as you downsize and tidy up.
And it sort of is.
But it’s also sort of not.
Because you’re not just thanking the item. You’re also taking the time to recognize how lucky you are to have clothes to wear. That you could afford what you have. Or maybe that someone was generous enough to give you a gift.
It was really hard to part with a scarf my brother got me two Christmases ago. I felt like I was giving that thoughtfulness away. Was I betraying my brother’s kindness?
But then I remembered to shift my focus. I decided to be grateful that my brother had thought of me and thank the scarf for keeping me warm on many, many nights since.
And surprisingly, I felt a lot better about gifting it up.
And gifting is the right word choice there. But more on that next week!
How to Declutter, Tidy Up & Downsize: Start Small
If you’re living in anything but a studio, tidying up can be overwhelming. Where to start?
1. Start with Clothes.
KonMari/Marie Kondo is on to something: starting with clothing works.
Why clothes? Because generally, your wardrobe is an accomplishable goal. Most people can go through all of their clothes in an afternoon, and it’s an easy “in” into the larger decluttering process.
Another reminder: Clothing includes all the accessories. Belts, shoes, coats, watches, scarves, hats, jewelry, etc. anything you wear you’ll be putting in the ‘clothes’ category.
How to Go Through Your Clothes
The easiest way to make sure this gets done is to put every clothing and clothing related item in a pile.
Literally. A pile.
This way you’ll really have a sense of how much you have, versus going through things a drawer at a time. Sometimes it’s not until we are confronted with how much we are holding onto, that we can clearly see how much we can let go of.
When I did this, I started with normal clothing items, plus coast, scarves, belts & hats. Then I worked on jewelry. Last came shoes.
Items that I was letting go of went in one pile, and everything else in another to be sorted, folded and put away. *For tips on how to responsibly get rid of clothes, check out this helpful post.
If you’re able to leave the excess clothing items for later, feel free to move on to the next phase tidy up phase!
2. Declutter in Categories
In the KonMari method, books come second, paperwork third, everything else fourth, and then sentimental items last.
KonMari Lesson 2 and 3 are great. But 4 is when things start to fall apart in the process for me. It’s just too overwhelming to go from manageable sections to AN ENTIRE HOUSEHOLD.
Decluttering by category is a great plan, as long as they stay a decent size.
I’ll use books here as an example of why decluttering by category can be useful.
Categories to tidy up by may include:
- Books
- Paperwork
- Arts & Crafts supplies
- Toiletries (include make-up, nailpolish, all those mini hotel shampoos and lotions)
- Children’s toys (include children’s books)
- Linens (towels, bed sheets, bed blankets, pillow cases)
- CD/DVDs/VHS tapes/cassette tapes/Vinyls/Records
As you tidy up these categories, set aside items that are of sentimental value. If that vinyl was the first album your dad gave you, set that aside to be looked at with the other sentimental items. Sentimental items should be tidied up last.
Books: A Case Study
Similar tidy up process to clothing: gather all the books in one room of the house, simply to see how many books you actually have. Go from room to room and collect all the books – they’re often hiding on shelves in guest rooms or on coffee tables in enclosed patios.
The only books I would exclude, would be children’s picture books. Cookbooks are fair game.
Now, how to decide what to keep?
Ultimately, it’s up to you, but here’s a decision tree if you’re really stumped!
When my SO and I moved out of our place in Los Angeles of nearly 4 years, we had A LOT of books, even after downsizing a full bookshelf! After these books spent nearly a YEAR in the closet of a studio in Portland, I decided it was time to go through them again. I pulled out my favorites, found a small bookshelf, and finally put them out in the open where I (or anyone else) can enjoy them.
And now I have easy access to my favorites. (At least, for the next few days.)
3. Tidy Up By Room
The advantage to this method is keeping the mess fairly contained…or at least in one room.
The process is the same: empty all the drawers, closets, desks, etc. in the room and put all the stuff in a pile in the middle of the room. If there is a bed or table (if you’re in a bedroom or the kitchen/dining room) feel free to make the pile on those surfaces. Again, it’s best if everything can be in one pile, so you can rally see how much you are working with.
If things come up that are sentimental, like pictures of family or special artwork, set those aside with the other sentimental items.
Organization
Marie Kondo is all about using boxes to tidy up and declutter. Little ones in particular to put in drawers to keep items from sliding around and getting lost in the literal shuffle. It’s a nice idea and certainly one to try if you’re particularly bothered by this. Shoebox lids and jewelry boxes seem to work well in shallow drawers.
Perhaps you will come across some during the process!
Another option is to just buy drawer organizers, though I’m not a big fan of buying more stuff to keep one’s stuff organized…adding items in order to tidy up is a bit counter-intuitive!
But I can say I much prefer organization over disorganization! Clear boxes are infinitely preferable when you have the chance as you can then SEE what’s in them without taking them off the shelf. Alternatively, a good label works equally well.
In the kitchen, there are a few options for organizing all those gadgets. Two basic ways: like-use items (measuring spoons & whisk in the same drawer; knives in another) or like-sized items (whisk & can opener & lemon squeezer)
4. A, B, G
Attic, Basement, and Garage are generally the big three neglected spaces when it comes to the tidy up process. These are spaces where we just shove boxes to ‘sort through later’ or to ‘keep forever’ but that we never actually get out and look at.
Even if you only have a garage, this is usually the hardest step because of the sheer size. It also seems larger items tend to build up in the ABG trifecta, making the downsizing part of this number tricky.
By this time, you know the drill: pile in the center of the room. For ABG it is almost better to get it out in the main house if possible. I find that generally, unfinished basements and drafty attics aren’t fun to spend a half-day or more in.
The Baby Boomer Dilemma: Tidy Up Your Furniture
Admit it. You have a problem with furniture.
It’s not your fault. Your parents already downsized, so you took on their furniture. And your kids might need it when they move out, so it just makes sense to hold on to. Furniture is expensive!
But, unless it’s Stickley, Drexel Heritage, or Ethan Allen piece, it’s maybe not worth keeping around.
Before leaving furniture in ABG, check how it’s holding up. These rooms are typically less climate controlled, and mold can develop must faster on the particle board bookshelves as compared to the solid wood ones.
And if it’s a really important piece, it should be on display for you to treasure!
Take for example Nana’s mid-century record player (still works!) on display in my parent’s living room. What a unique piece of furniture!
For options on how to get rid of furniture responsibly, stay tuned for next week’s post!
5. Sentimental Items
At this stage in the tidy up and declutter game, you should have a sentimental items pile.
Sentimental items can be more taxing emotionally and tend to take longer to go through, since, as the name belies, they’re bringing up lots of memories!
Give yourself a full day to go through this pile. If you come across items showing signs of wear and tear, it may be time to properly preserve them.
Where possible, it’s always fun to get the sentimental items on display. Pictures and artwork can be put in photo albums or hung on walls. Shadow boxes are often a fun way to display sentimental items.
For our first Christmas as a couple, I reused a poster to wrap SO’s gifts and made a bow out of magazine paper. I doodled on the backside of the poster, livening up the white space with an elephant and lotus and “CoExist,” among other things.
When we were reunited after the Christmas break, he had hung up the decorated paper above his door in his bedroom. It fell down a few times and got a bit squashed when we moved twice that summer. When we settled into our new place, I took the ‘wrapping paper’ to a frame store and got it framed in a simple black box. It now hangs above our bed.
There’s lots of ways to display sentimental items, especially when you are willing to get creative!
And if you end up getting rid of sentimental items, you can consider making a journal, with a picture of each item and a story of the meaningfulness of the item.
When it comes to sentimental items though, it’s still important to think of quality, not quantity. And again, don’t let negative emotions like guilt keep you holding onto things. Let the positives associations come through!
If there’s an item that make you sad every time you see it, examine that: why keep it? If you truly don’t want to part with it, is there a positive emotion you can attach to it instead of a melancholic one?
Extra Stuff
While I still get the urge to “buy, buy, buy” whenever I walk into Target or Home Goods, I’m getting better.
But it can be an uphill battle! We live in a society where there is disposable income and a very materialistic culture.
And while I’m not a minimalist, I try to embrace that more and more. I try to think of what will happen to the things I buy in the long-term, not just the short term. I try to buy high-quality goods for their longevity, and biodegradable products when it’s a short-term use.
And if I can’t find these options, I’ll make do without it until I can afford the less-wasteful option. After all, I’ve gone this long without a whatever-it-is. Another few months, years, decades isn’t going to hurt.
Next up, how to get rid of your things responsibly PLUS a Big Announcement!